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<DIV>> Watch out for these new viruses - Neither Symantec or McAfee have any solutions for these yet!!!
<DIV></DIV>> The Dubya Virus - Causes your computer to keep looking for viruses of mass destruction.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Al Gore Virus - Causes your computer to just keep counting and re-counting.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Clinton Virus - Gives you a 7-inch Hard Drive with NO memory.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Bob Dole (aka Viagra) Virus - Makes a new hard drive out of an old floppy.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Lewinsky Virus - Sucks all the memory out of your computer, then e-mails everyone about what it did.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Ronald Reagan Virus - Saves your data, but forgets where it is stored.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Mike Tyson Virus - Quits after two bytes
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Oprah Winfrey Virus - Your 300 Mb hard drive shrinks to 100 Mb, then slowly expands to re-stabilize around 200 Mb.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Jack Kevorkian Virus - Deletes all old files.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Ellen Degeneres Virus - Disks can no longer be inserted.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Prozac Virus - Totally screws up your RAM, but your processor doesn't care.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Joey Buttafuoco Virus - Only attacks minor files.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus - Terminates some files, leaves, but will be back.
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...
<DIV></DIV>>
<DIV></DIV>> The Lorena Bobbitt Virus - Reformats your hard drive into a 3.5 inch floppy . . . then discards it through Windows.
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