Get Bent Sportfishing

Home Fish Counts Hot New Reports Arcade Tips & Tricks Music Montages Weather
Go Back   Get Bent Sportfishing > NON FISHING RELATED > Jokes
Register Forum Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Jokes Jokes - Remember we have minors viewing the board so use your better judgement please.

Sent Items
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 02-14-2008, 11:57 AM   #1 (permalink)
Senior Member
 
sourcreamnjive's Avatar
 
Name: Joe Pineapple
Location: Channel Islands, California
Vessel: 15' Starcraft "Dos Gatos Gordos"
Occupation: Chef on the Mirage & Musician/Songwriter
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 9,752
Thumbs up Lawyers

Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you." The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with threedifferent women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him." The defense attorney almost died. The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you fu#*ing idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."

__________________

The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs.


There's also a negative side.
sourcreamnjive is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2008, 05:46 PM   #2 (permalink)
Member
 
saba's Avatar
 
Name: richard
Location: san luis obispo
Occupation: fishaholic
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 400
hahaha
saba is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-14-2008, 09:10 PM   #3 (permalink)
Moderator
 
Carnivore's Avatar
 
Name: Drew
Location: Thousand Oaks
Vessel: 23' Striper WA/ 250 Yami OB- blood thirsty
Occupation: Zebco Pro-staffer
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 15,929
LOL!!!
__________________
This signature brought to you in
D O U B L E V I S I O N !
where drunk.
Additional funding from the laser enema company, wallah wallah, WA.
___________________________________
Member .( Forever!)
_____________________________________________
Carnivore is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2008, 05:39 AM   #4 (permalink)
Senior Member
 
PilotLight's Avatar
 
Name: Kelly
Location: Valencia, California
Vessel: 37'Pearson, "Pilot Light"
Occupation: Tool and Die Maker
Join Date: Aug 2005
Posts: 1,151
PilotLight is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On


All times are GMT -8. The time now is 05:24 PM.


Copyright © 2000 - 2009 Get Bent Sportfishing - All Rights Reserved

Saltwater 100 - The most popular fishing websites on the Internet!

Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
SEO by vBSEO 3.2.0 ©2008, Crawlability, Inc.